All That I've Got
by sorasqueenb
Summary: If I had a choice, I would chose to live happily with the goodness, the light, and the one who gives me everything I want. But I can't help what my heart continues to crave, and what my restless mind yearns for. There was a fine line between wants and needs. And that was why I found myself in front of his doorstep on those sleepless nights. SoraxKairixVanitas. ONESHOT.


**-* All That I've Got *-**

**A/N:** This is a twisted, sexy little one shot dedicated to my OTL and wife forever Princess-Xion. I hope you guys like it, it's a little different than what I usually go for. Hehe! SoraxKairixVanitas.

I do not own The Used, although I would absolutely love to. Or Kingdom hearts, for that matter :(

OH WELL.

* * *

It was the end of April when I made my deal with Vanitas.

I didn't want to, but my desires threatened me. What other choice did I have?

If I didn't just do this, I would never know what I wanted.

And someone could end up getting hurt. I could end up hurt.

Lord knows I don't need to be hurt anymore in my life.

He knew what I wanted, but he didn't care.

He knew what _he_ wanted. To his own lust, he much more obeyed.

I couldn't give an answer as to why Sora continues to shelter me.

He knows what happens when I leave him on those nights, yet he continues to cherish me.

To idolize me like some princess of purity that I ultimately was _not_.

Now we are in the middle of a sublime, beautiful, and lush summer.

And I've seem to become a creature of habit, to say the least.

My name is Kairi. And I'm caught in a viscous cycle of lust and love. Like a spider who has caught two prey, weighing her options.

To devour the more filling, heart-wrenching catch, or to relish in the most delicious of all delicacies.

It was a choice I have never come to choose.

It was because at first, I didn't even have a choice.

Now it was because I wasn't sure I even wanted it any longer.

I was no longer as sure as I thought I once was.

I was unfortunately accustomed. I was in control, and I felt I had a purpose.

To love one, and be loved by another.

To love one who gives me the world, but to desire the one who gives me nothing at all.

He just keeps on taking.

_**So deep, that it didn't even bleed and catch me**_

_**Off guard, red handed **_

_**Now I'm far from lonely.**_

The heavy summer sun made its way through the small crack in the window, and I squinted my eye open to catch a glimpse of the distant sunrise.

I yawned, and sat up slowly, stretching in the process.

Sora's room was so comfortable, so warm and inviting. From his fluffy black comforter to his flat screen TV and band posters on the walls.

His home was my home. And I knew that..

"Kairi.." A raspy, tired voice called from underneath me.

_**Asleep, I still see you lying next to me.**_

_**So deep, that it didn't even bleed and catch me I…**_

Strong arms tenderly grabbed my tiny waist, pulling me back onto the bed and securing me in the warmth I often craved.

I smiled and snuggled into his chest in return, stroking his bare back with my fingertips.

He was utterly perfect.

I was _anything_ but deserving.

He ran his fingers through my waist-length crimson locks and his aqua eyes gazed up to meet with my periwinkle orbs.

"Good morning, princess." He stated, kissing the tip of my nose.

His chocolate brown, spiky hair was strewn about, sticking up in all different directions.

It was still completely superlative in my eyes.

He would always be perfect to me, no matter what.

But I couldn't help but feel unworthy of his greatness.

_**I need something else**_

_**Would someone please just give me.**_

_**Hit me, knock me out and let me go back to sleep.**_

Sora was... just so much. He was so full of goodness. He would never hurt me. He would never dominate, or cross the line.

But that was just the thing..

_**I can laugh all I want**_

_**Inside I still am empty.**_

_**So deep, that it didn't even bleed and catch me I..**_

Sora looked at me, apprehension written all over his impeccable features.

I grabbed his hand and gave his look a rebuttal, but longing and desperation were the only things to swirl about in my eyes.

Sora could tell what I needed, and he was glad to tend to those needs.

Within a very few, tender moments, he was on top of me.

And I was melting beneath him, although I felt there was a small piece of ice in my heart that refused to melt.

But nothing was never dull with Sora, not at all.

He still had my heart pounding, my palms sweating, and the sweet wet euphoria that swooshed over the very core of me.

He slowly inched my panties down my slender thighs, and looked up at me.

He always had that look of reassurance..

I didn't need to be reassured. I always wanted him. He needed to know that.

There was never a time that I needed reassurance, but yet he always gave it to me.

And I couldn't help but be a bit bothered by it.

I took charge and took hold of his strong, steady arms that were planed on either side of my mostly nude body.

I urged him as close to me as he could go, until I felt it.

He became one with me as he slowly slid inside.

_**I'll be just fine, pretending I'm not.**_

_**I'm far from lonely and It's all that Ive got.**_

I moaned his name in the simplest ecstasy as he went faster and harder, and I could feel the waves of pleasure take over my troubled soul.

He lasted for what seemed like an eternity, and making love to him had run my body dry.

My heart was erratic, and my bones were exhausted once more as I collapsed beside him.

Sora kissed my neck tenderly, before getting up to pull on his boxers and a pair of blue skinny jeans, and gave me a glance.

He quickly and playfully hopped back down on top of me and kissed me all over, nuzzling my long hair with his nose.

He stood up again and walked out of his bedroom, towards the hallway.

"How bout some breakfast, you hungry?" He mumbled, already half way into the hallway.

There was a disconsolate look upon his features.

"Yeah. Love ya." I called back.

"I love _you_, Kai." He replied.

It was strange. It was almost as if he didn't believe my statement. That he was the only one who felt the love.

I looked down, ashamed of the things I've done and all of the..doubt that had often washed over me.

I knew I loved Sora..but it was normal to experience doubt, right? To want to experience … other things?

To be unsure..

_**I'll be just fine, pretending I'm not.**_

_**I'm far from lonely and it's all that I've got.**_

* * *

"Figured you'd come." Vanitas said, leaning against the door frame ever so casually.

He obviously was _not_ surprised to see me at his door at such a late hour.

"I..um.." I spluttered out.

Why on God's green earth would I be so anxious around _him_.

Of all people!?

"Well come on in." He said almost cautiously.

His voice was like ice through my veins.

I walked in, now that I was so courteously invited.

Something about this place lit my senses on fire.

It was dark, but comfortably alluring.

Scents of cologne, sex and whiskey lingered in the air.

I blushed, and prayed he didn't notice.

He would certainly question it..

And I was instantly wet.

Vanitas paced around, adorned in nothing but a pair of of plaid pajama pants and shoved a popsicle into his mouth.

"Want one?" He gestured, holding the freezer door open.

I shook my head "no", and he closed it, beginning to walk towards me.

"Van.." I began to say something to him.

I couldn't even remember what it was, or if it was even important when he appeared, centimeters away from my face.

He took the arm he wasn't using to hold the popsicle, and brought his hand up behind the nape of my neck, grabbing a thick bunch of my hair tilting my head up in the process.

_**I guess, I remember every glance you shot me.**_

As I looked into his amber eyes I feared the heat that radiated from my body would have melted his popsicle, doubtlessly.

_**I'm losing weight and some body height.**_

He took the popsicle out of his mouth, looked at it almost quizzically, and pointed it towards my mouth.

There were no words needed, as I knew Van, and want it was he was insinuating.

Keeping my eyes on him, I opened my mouth and took the popsicle into my mouth, in its whole entirety, until all that could be seen was the small wooden end of it.

Slowly, I bobbed my head, sucking in an 'up and down' motion on the delicious, strawberry popsicle.

I went down for one last suck, coming up slowly releasing the popsicle from my mouth and licking my lips.

"It's good." I smiled, my lips feeling numb from the coldness.

"Mm..I thought you'd like it." He replied, a dangerous hunger coating his voice.

I didn't have enough time to continue dialogue, as he quickly scooped me up into his arms.

I wrapped my tiny legs around his waist as he carried me to the kitchen counter.

He let out a stifled moan as he dug his teeth into the side of my neck.

Vanitas lifted his one hand off the counter to fondle my breast, leaving the other planted firmly beside me on the black marble.

I let out a sigh of pleasure.

"Take this off." He ordered, pointing to my shirt.

I obliged and threw the white, spaghetti-strapped tank top off.

I could see the satisfaction gleaming in his eyes as my bare chest was displayed for his hungry eyes.

The hand that was previously on my breast traveled back up to my long locks, grabbing it tightly into a pony tail once more.

Using my hair as a reign, he tilted my head back sharply, delving back into my neck.

With his body pushing against mine, I could feel his solidity, and I felt I could no longer wait.

I pushed against him, pulling my legs tighter around his waist, feeling the full entirety of his erection.

"Not yet darlin'."

He was teasing me, and he knew it.

_**I squoze so hard I stopped your heart from beating.**_

Picking me up off the counter, he carried me to his room, his lips never leaving my neck.

"Van, I.. I want.."

I couldn't take it, I was bound to explode any living, breathing second.

"What do you want?" He asked, almost _lovingly, _staring into my eyes, all while still holding me around him.

Amber and periwinkle, lust and passion.

What do I say

"I…" Is this really what I wanted?

"Tell me." He demanded.

It was.

"You." I breathed out.

In that moment he threw me unforgivingly onto his bed, landing on top of me not a second after.

"You'll get what you want." He said promisingly.

"But I'm going to get what I want first."

Before I could comprehend what exactly he was getting it, both his hands were on both of my thighs, and my legs quickly parted from a force that was _anything_ but delicate.

His eyes met mine in the dim light for a split second, before he smirked and went down on me.

His tongue just barely touched the tip of me, and I was already undone.

This is what I craved, desired, and _yearned_ for.

And Van crossed boundaries Sora wouldn't dare to cross.

And maybe that was what I was searching for all this time..

"Van-please! I.. I'm.."

Before I could experience my intoxicating release, he lifted his head.

"I said not yet." He reprimanded.

_**So deep, that I didn't even scream fuck me I…**_

"But-" I was quickly interrupted by the clash of his lips onto mine.

I consumed the kiss, tasting myself on his beautiful, twisted tongue.

He stopped, and looked at me for a moment. It was as if he was wondering what to do with me next.

This was all the more inciting to me.

Without further edu, he flipped my whole body so I was face down on the bed.

I could feel him position himself behind me and suddenly felt fabric on top of my eyes.

He was.._blindfolding_ me.

"Va-" I started.

"It will just make your pleasure better, Kai-_ri_."He said my name whimsically.

I was honestly unsure as to whether or not I've already had an orgasm.

_**I'll be just fine, pretending I'm not.**_

_**I'm far from lonely and it's all that I've got.**_

I must have been lost in my thoughts, because Vanitas once again pulling my crimson locks for his control brought me back to reality.

This beautiful, twisted, reality.

_**It's all that I've got.**_

He thurst inside me without warning and I saw stars through the blindfold.

It was the best ecstasy I'd ever experienced.

He was far more addictive than any drug.

I loudly moaned, due to the pain of his forced entrance mixed with the pleasure of his massive member inside of me.

"My name, Kairi. Say my name." He commanded.

"Vanitas!" I didn't even have to question, it came so naturally.

"Mm.. good girl." He rewarded me with a harsh slap on the rear end.

He continued to hold on to both cheeks as he increased his pace, grunting and panting, fucking me like the wild, animalistic creature that he was.

That I loved.

He reached around to stick his index finger in my mouth.

I sucked on it, mimicking my actions with the popsicle previously.

"Kairi." He breathed out.

_**It's all that I've got.**_

When we both finished, I felt like I was melting completely.

It was because I knew that piece of ice remaining in my heart had finally perished.

It was much more peaceful, unlike the many nights that I would have just up and left, returning to Sora's warmth.

Something was.. so _very_, very different tonight.

_Vanitas_ had come to possess the warmth.

He now hailed the light _and_ the darkness.

_**It's all that I've got.**_

He didn't bother to get up or get dressed. He just laid with me, skin on skin.

Heart to heart.

"Kairi.." He mumbled, softy taking a strand of my hair in his fingers.

His amber eyes danced about, a new, unknown emotional surfacing upon them.

"Stay the night."

_**So deep, that it didn't even bleed and catch me.**_

_**So deep, that I didn't even scream fuck me.**_

**_I'm far from lonely and it's all that I've got._  
**

* * *

**A/N**: Wow. Just wow. My LAWD. So this is clearly the STEAMIEST story I've ever known myself to write. But I enjoyed it SO much. I hope you guys like it as well. For some reason I'm really loving the SoraxKairixVanitas and just KairixVanitas pairings, this is unlike me! I wanted this story to be dark, and to make Kairi the one who was NOT innocent for once.

RIAHH. I hope you like it my BAE MY BOO. ILY OH SO MUCH DAHLING.

xo

Let me know what you thought!

RAIE


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